Friendship- we all desire it. We were made for community. Having people in our lives who know us and care for us is one of the most welcome aspects of life. Community is an outlet to love and be loved, a place to serve, and filled with people with whom to live out one’s purpose.
In today’s fast-paced always-online culture, it can be difficult to cultivate a community of solid relationships. Many people are very lonely, surrounded by people all the time, in one form or another, but with very few people in their lives who actually know much of what makes up who he or she is.
Being the kind of friend you want to have and stepping out to form new relationships is of vital importance to someone looking to find community. In finding community, it is important to build a culture of relationships that last.
Here are five habits of someone with lasting friendships:
- They care about what matters to their friends. Someone with lasting friendships consistently shows an interest in what is going on in their friends’ lives, even when it isn’t something that interests them. Much like a solid marriage, a person with lasting friendships discovers just asking about and listening to their friends talk about their lives is a huge way to show their care and support.
- They accept their friends for who they are.
Someone with lasting friendships accepts and loves their friends for who they are. Instead of attempting to correct or “fix” the quirks, someone with lasting friendships loves and accepts their friends as-are. Even when their friends are doing things they don’t approve of, someone with lasting friendships knows how to hold their tongue and simply be a friend.
- They speak honestly with their friends about what they think, believe, and feel.
Going hand-in-hand with #2, someone with lasting friendships is honest with their thoughts, beliefs, and feelings and knows the balance to offering unsolicited advice and being honest when they know their friends need to hear the truth. A person with lasting friendships is not afraid to be honest and can give honest feedback about the choices and thoughts of their friends. While this may push some away, those seeking lasting friendships will value this honesty and will recognize a deep, lasting relationship requires honesty.
- They know the importance of give and take.
Someone with lasting friendships recognizes the necessity of give and take in relationships. Their friendships reflect mutual interests, a sharing of the details of life, and the ability to be the person someone goes to for help and to be a person who can go to others for help. Humility is necessary for true give and take, as is the choice to be vulnerable.
- They are there for the good and the bad.
Someone with lasting friendships is not just there when things are good. They walk with others through the hard times in life, and surround themselves with friends they know will be there for them in such times. This is a make-or-break quality of relationships that last, versus those that do not. While sometimes it is necessary to walk away from unhealthy relationships, someone with lasting friendships only does so when necessary and is there for their friends, even when things aren’t comfortable and fun. Alternatively, when things are good, someone with lasting relationships knows the value of having simple fun with their friends and recognizes that this is an important element for the health of the relationship.
Do your friendships have these five qualities? Are you a friend who exemplifies these five habits? If you are looking for community, work on being a friend to those you know by living out these 5 habits in your relationships today.
Comment below and share a time a friend exemplified one of these five habits in your life!